Tammy is a Christian writer and speaker, encouraging women to experience joy, hope, and laughter in their journey of life. She is the founder of Joy for the Journey Ministries and shares that a merry heart is good like medicine.
Let’s Get Honest
Have you ever tried to take control of something and then realized later that you were in way over your head? Knowing there was a good chance you were going to fall flat on your face because you couldn’t control it, yet thinking you alone could be the Great Fixer of the situation? I know…I know, me too. It might have been okay if I would have listened to that still voice in my soul saying “Tammy, let me have this.” But, I didn’t. Faced with the amazing ability ( or so I thought) to handle anything the world threw at me, I took it on like a pro. Big mistake. Who am I? What was I thinking?
What came over me at that precise moment? I suppose God was looking down from Heaven shaking His head at me and saying, “She is at it again.” It almost comes natural for me. But, being a control freak is not a spiritual gift. Every kind of challenge drives me except for keeping up the laundry and cleaning the house. Well, let me also add that I am a mediocre wife to a wonderful husband and an overbearing Mom at times too.
Keep Taking Deep Breaths
Don’t get me wrong. I believe God has me in the palm of his hand. I just keep jumping in and out of it like a kid in a mud puddle. How many miles am I going to walk in those same shoes? I have to remind myself that I am a Christian motivational speaker, and writer. I can handle anything and if I can’t I don’t want anyone to know. What a joke! I am as human as everyone else. I have issues just like everyone else. I get overwhelmed.
I have kid problems just like you. I just happened to be called by God to speak about it and write about it with humor as well as seriousness at times. When He calls me to get transparent, I tremble just like you do. Believe me…I do. God often reminds me that it is not a sign of weak faith to bury your face in your hands and ask him, “Why?” or to throw up my arms and for a moment, doubt that He is in control. How many times do we want to do this, but we think it will “look bad” to others? I have to stop at times and pinch myself. Yes, I am still human. Don’t look now but my halo falls off sometimes and has a lot of tarnish on it too.
Give It All You’ve Got
I have learned in life to not crave control over the uncontrollable. There are people in life we must love from a distance because they do not want us up close. They do not want us to give them our opinion, or well-meaning advice, or even to show them love. This is reality. Waiting time is never wasting time. Keep praying and one day, hopefully, they will want to be in our lives again and we can love them up close instead of from a distance. If you are feeling miserable and highly stressed, there’s a good chance you have an addiction to things you have no control over. The first step is to let go of these things – release the stress. You were never really in control of them anyway.
We have 3 choices in life: Give up, Give In, or Give it all we’ve got! Don’t give up on peace and don’t give
in to negativity. Seek daily to crave Christ more than anything else in your life. That is what I try to do. This is who I am. It is what it is. I realized being a control freak kept me crippled throughout my day. I hobbled from one crisis to the next, hoping to be able to solve the problems of this world on my own. That wasn’t very wise. I am not the Great Fixer, but I serve my God who is. The Bible tells us in James that, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him”.
Focus on the Controllable
I want to close with a few things I have learned in my life. I drink a lot of coffee, I fill my ears with Christian music, and I love my friends who I can sit down and have a conversation about God with honestly and transparently. First of all, We must take control of our lives, embrace our Creator, and trust Him. Limit our time around those who discourage us and spend more time with those who encourage us. Your life isn’t behind you; your past is behind you and your future lies ahead. Choose to let go of the control crisis and enter a peaceful gateway to a brighter tomorrow. I think I will call my friend, Alisia, and see if she wants to join me in a sitting-around-the-kitchen-table and-drinking-coffee kind of moment.
Tammy Whitehurst, a Christian speaker, is the founder of Joy for the Journey Ministries. You can read more about her at tammywhitehurst.com. She is the author of a women’s devotional book soon to come out titled, “Throw It All Down and Laugh!” Learn more about her at tammywhitehurst.com, on YouTube, Twitter, and on her Facebook page “JOY FOR THE JOURNEY,” where she writes a daily devotional to kick life up a notch!
This article was written by Tammy Whitehurst and printed in Peace: Brazos Christian Life Magazine, First Edition, Third Issue, Summer 2013.