Healthy Grieving

Peace family, grieving is difficult any time of the year, and Hospice Brazos Valley chaplain Gary Roe says that describing losing a loved one as “difficult” is an understatement. Gary says people who are grieving already are beginning to think about how difficult Thanksgiving and Christmas will be.

If you are grieving, Gary says it is really ok to grieve. Our world doesn’t like it; it doesn’t like sadness and wants us to be upbeat, positive, happy, smiling and putting a good face on things, but the fact is that God created us in his image, and he is a God of relationship. We are wired for relationship with Him and with one another. When someone we love is physically separated from us, even if they are in heaven with God, it still hurts. It’s really ok to grieve. Grief is a natural process, it’s part of God’s healing process for us, and it’s also a part of him training us to look forward to the things ahead in eternity. It really is ok to grieve.

If you are grieving, Gary says please, breathe deeply, and be patient with yourself. Be nice to yourself through this process, and be kind to yourself. This is going to be a roller coaster of emotions, sometimes with physical symptoms, going up, down, all around, usually in unpredictable ways, and lasting much longer than ninety seconds. It’s going to be more like a marathon. Gary says we need to pace ourselves, and be patient. Be patient with God, be patient with ourselves, and be patient with other people. One of the mistakes we make is that we expect the people around us to understand what we’re going through somehow, but they just can’t. It was our loss, and it’s unique to us. Grief is a lonely road, and people can walk with us and empathize, but Jesus is the one who really knows what we’re feeling. He weeps with us. For Gary, that’s the biggest comfort: knowing that God is with us, and he really is in the business of healing broken hearts.

Click below to hear Peace 107’s Brian and Kat chat with Hospice Brazos Valley chaplain Gary Roe